My spine is broken.

So 3 years ago (as of last week actually) on a Friday night I was doing yoga, trying to stretch out what I thought was a tight muscle in my back. I finally got a good stretch going and when I stood up I felt something sort of pop in my lower back. I went to move toward the couch and found I couldn't move my legs. I started to panic. I managed to penguin-waddle over to the couch and sit down when I felt another pop and the pain started. It was the absolute worst pain I have ever experienced in my life and I hope I never have to go through that ever again. So, I called my Mum and told her what had happened. She told me to call Ask-a-nurse. I called them and they said I had pulled a muscle in my back and need to take some aspirin or ibuprofen and lay on a heating pad. So I did. It did no good whatsoever. I was confined to the couch and my boyfriend (now husband) had to help me take baby steps to get to the bathroom. The next day I went to Instant Care who said they thought I had a ruptured disc and promptly sent me to the emergency room. The doctor in the emergency room told me I had pulled a muscle, despite the burning pain running down to my foot in my right leg, gave me a prescription for narcotics and sent me on my way. I was frustrated to say the least. Monday morning I called my doctor's office as soon as they opened and got an appointment to see my doctor. He said he thought it was a ruptured disc and sent me off for an MRI immediately. The MRI showed that my L5-S1 disc had indeed ruptured and was pinching my sciatic nerve on the right side (hence not being able to use my leg) so I was sent off to a Neurosurgeon for evaluation for surgery. I should mention that I was in my last semester of finishing my BA and had a 12 hour load, including 2 art studio classes. SO I tried to put off surgery until the end of the semester. I used a tens unit (electronic muscle stimulation) and narcotics to help me get thorough until May but I couldn't make it. I had to drop all but 2 of my classes since I couldn't drive or walk to class. In March of 2006 I went in for surgery, survived and went home 2 days later after a reaction to the morphine that made me hallucinate and try to rip my skin off. (Now I know...morphine bad...) I healed up thanks to my awesome husband, Mum, and future mother-in-law taking care of me. I was doing fine until the following February when I started having severe pain again. I saw my neurosurgeon and he diagnosed me with osteoarthritis, told me to move someplace warm and gave me 800mg ibuprofen to take. I did so and started PT to help my muscles regain their strength. I've struggled with the arthritis for the past 2 1/2 years, fearing cold weather and long work days. I've cried myself to sleep at night a few times because the pain was so bad. I get charlie horses in my legs constantly, more frequently at night. I finally couldn't take it any more and went to see my PA about the pain. I wanted arthritis medicine rather than pain killers since they weren't working. She prescribed me Mobic to help with the arthritis and sent me to PT again.
I had my first PT appointment on Tuesday (1/13) and it was a life-changing event. The therapist said there was no way arthritis alone was causing all of my symptoms, especially the pain in my leg. She said my disc had to be bulging again. I tried to do some simple exercises and was shaking with pain. She had me stop and hooked me up to an E-Stim machine (Electronic stimulation to help ease the pain) and gave me a heating pad (one of the best things on the face of the planet in my opinion). 15 minutes later I was feeling better. She did some traction on my leg to help take some pressure off the disc and it felt good. I left with a sense of happiness form the pain relief but also a sense of dread. She put me on restrictions of no lifting and no bending over (if I can help it). So I have to learn to ask for help, which is the hardest part for me. I'm quite independent. I'm now paranoid about rupturing the disc again, praying the PT can help me reverse some of the damage done. I don't know if I can go through the pain of the injury and the surgery again. I only have 40% of that disc left and if it were to rupture...well...the remedies for that are not pleasant. Spinal fusion or rods and plates in my back. Not options I want think about at age 27 and I want to have children. So many things to think about.
At any rate, that's my current situation. I muddle through the day and look forward to layign down on my super comfy bed (pillow top + memory foam= OMG comfy) and relaxing with my husband and animals.